hey gratefulcat,
I don't think you are a dork at all, and I admire your courage to face your fear and anger and do the right thing by being honest. As someone who is paralyzed and controlled by fear I can understand how hard that must have been. I hope the BON can see how much you have grown and changed since making your past mistakes and grant you your license. Have you written a letter to the board explaining the ways you have done that..I know in the state of Maine that can be very helpful.
Good Luck
lp