I would like to talk to some older nurses that may be able to give me some clues as to why with the shortage I am treated so poorly
Are there any older nurses here?
Could you define "older" please? Then maybe I can help you.
what is older and what is treated poorly and treated poorly by whom?
45 years and up
treated poorly is just that, told by younger nurses to go onto disability,
treated poorly is just that, told by younger nurses to go onto disability,
In a forum/web board such as this, I feel at a great disadvantage to remark on a question such as the one about being treated poorly. Now, let me preface what I am going to say with the fact that there is absolutely no judgement intended in my reply and this is not a finger-pointing statement. The point I am getting to is that when people come into a forum looking for advice or comments on being "treated poorly", it is difficult to speculate because none of us happened to be present when the "poor treatment" took place to know what truly happened. Perceptions can be so different from one person to the next. The thing about younger nurses telling you to go on disability? Well, first of all, if you are healthy, active and reliable in the workplace, then that would be an unfounded and snied remark. However, again, none of us know your complete situation or what preceded that sort of remark to be able to fairly say whether it was a valid suggestion. Please don't think I advocate for one second that nurses of ANY age have the right to be rude. That certainly would be wrong. I hope you find happiness in your job soon.
treated poorly?? as a nurse?? say it isnt so.
I agree with grapejam, hard for us to tell if you are physically fit...or if they were joking and you took your age too personally...or if they were just rude.
I agree with grapejam, hard for us to tell if you are physically fit...or if they were joking and you took your age too personally...or if they were just rude.
They were rude and it was a way to steal my job from me
as grapejam said it's hard to judge here is it co-workers or bosses trying to get rid of you. Do they want your job because you have a better shift. Do you pull the same number of patients with the same problems as everyone else. If there's no reason for them to be saying it go to the supervisor if they are harassing you..if it's the supervisor the DON. I work with a LPN who is 65 that works her tail off and wheezes like a choo-choo but I'd never suggest she take off. Work with another about 45 who's off more then on with neck pain, back pain, twisted leg, grandkids dumped on her etc etc & another 39 who has kids and grandkids calling numerous times and she can't get anything done they both have FMLA (family leave) and their jobs are held when they take off which does cause scheduling problems for others and they abuse the system by calling in 2 hours before scheduled work. So all the situations are different for everyone all you've told us is they want your job but why?
I wish I knew why. They got my job. I was constantly pulled into the office for stupid stuff. I got written up for excessive call ins. I called in 5 times in 15 months and 3 of those days were for the flu which I caught there. But that's not why I am here they did what they did for what ever reasons I just want to move on but I can't because of this place. I have not been here for very long and that place is my only reference. I was there for 15 months, my yearly evaluation was good. It was a bad place and there is a lot more going on that I wasn't aware of. Supervisor was always trying to get me to say something bad about the African Americans or the Philipino nurses that work there. Like I said I am not sure what their motives were But, I am in a bad situation now and need some help on how to move on and not get caught up in that nonsense again>
What were the ages of the nurses you worked with? You referred to age as a factor for your job threat, which if unfounded is a discriminating thing to say. Yet, later in your last post, you mentioned being absent 5 times in 15 months (regardless of the flu..5 times in that time frame is a lot)and I see mention of being called in the office for "stupid stuff". Again, I will say that with bits and pieces of any story, it is hard to formulate an educated idea of what really happened. You also mentioned that you worked in an ethnically diverse population and that your employer was trying to get you to discriminate. This sounds very complicated in some regards, but very simple in others. Up front, my opinion is that somehow your employer did not regard you as dependable and for reasons I don't think we are being educated on, wanted you to leave. Without knowing everything that happened, it is not possible for a person such as myself to hazard a guess as to how you could avoid this in the future. I feel sorry that you are in such a predicament, I just don't think I can help.
5 times in 15 months is not excessive, you sound like you are looking to discredit me, why would you want to do that? and I am sorry people should not have to go to work vomiting and having diarrhea all over and the flu is an exceptable reason. Do you lack any compassion for nurses? I saw people going to work sick just because of that attitude and all they did was spread everything around. You have not been in this situation so you probably can't help but don't try to discredit me because you lack understanding. There is way too much of that in nursing as it is and causing more problems than need to be there. and for your information a couple of those days were personal days and I had only taken 3 of my vacation days. The place was well staffed with nurses they did not experience any increase work load because of me calling off. Besides others called off a lot more than that and they are still there. Like I said before I do not want to get into the politics of what was going on there it just wasn't pretty, leave it at that.
Besides this was a geriatric setting and these people can not tolerate that type of illness and can die from that exposure. So going to work with that type of illness is self centered. and if an employer is not able to see that then they should not be working with that population. When I first went to nursing school we were taught that you "do not go to work ill" period. Enough saud on that topic. This is not a factory job. There are multple considerations that need to be examined.
"
"5 times in 15 months is a lot..." You must be some kind of whoop-de-do SUPERNURSE; maybe you're blessed with a super immune system. Maybe you don't work as hard as some others; maybe you have a cushy job without much exposure to the various forms of crud the rest of us are exposed to. Maybe you never have a personal or family reason to call in -- lucky you! Maybe you're trying to be Mother Teresa. Maybe you just love your job so much you can't imagine ever calling in for any reason. Maybe you're one of the shmucks who come in with a fever and a cough, spreading the joy all around to the rest of us. Considering the crushing schedules and job stress which impair the immune system, not to mention brutalizing the spirit, 5 times in 15 months (about once every 3 months) is not that bad.
"5 times in 15 months is a lot..." You must be some kind of whoop-de-do SUPERNURSE; maybe you're blessed with a super immune system. Maybe you don't work as hard as some others; maybe you have a cushy job without much exposure to the various forms of crud the rest of us are exposed to. Maybe you never have a personal or family reason to call in -- lucky you! Maybe you're trying to be Mother Teresa. Maybe you just love your job so much you can't imagine ever calling in for any reason. Maybe you're one of the shmucks who come in with a fever and a cough, spreading the joy all around to the rest of us. Considering the crushing schedules and job stress which impair the immune system, not to mention brutalizing the spirit, 5 times in 15 months (about once every 3 months) is not that bad.[ QUOTE ]
rnsince83 said:
" "5 times in 15 months is a lot..." You must be some kind of whoop-de-do SUPERNURSE; maybe you're blessed with a super immune system. Maybe you don't work as hard as some others; maybe you have a cushy job without much exposure to the various forms of crud the rest of us are exposed to. Maybe you never have a personal or family reason to call in -- lucky you! Maybe you're trying to be Mother Teresa. Maybe you just love your job so much you can't imagine ever calling in for any reason. Maybe you're one of the shmucks who come in with a fever and a cough, spreading the joy all around to the rest of us. Considering the crushing schedules and job stress which impair the immune system, not to mention brutalizing the spirit, 5 times in 15 months (about once every 3 months) is not that bad.
[/ QUOTE ]
I challenge you and all others to pose the 5 times in 15 months question to any employer...see what they say. I merely state what I know to be true. I never claimed to be a wondernurse, nor made any attempt to discredit anyone with any statement. The poster that came to this forum making it seem that he/she is being discriminated against because of age and multiple absences ,is wanting to give only certain facts of the case, and will not go into all the rest. How on earth can any rational person decide what was right or wrong in a case such as this. Personal attacks such as the one you just launched on me are totally uncalled for. Just to enlighten you, I have not just fallen off the turnip truck, have worked in critical care for the last 11 years and am no stranger to SICK people who can't be exposed to further threats. I am all for someone calling in if truly warranted. I never said someone shouldn't call in if they are truly sick, did I? Show me where I said that. Furthermore, I never said that this person didn't truly need to be off each and every time. But the tone of the posts I see here combined with the finger-pointing when asked for more information can only make me suspicious that there is WAY more to this person's story than they are letting on and I am supposed to be instantly sympathetic to this person and not be inquisitive? This forum, last I checked, was for the asking of questions, answering of questions, tossing ideas around freely so long as they aren't personal attacks. I never made any such attack on anyone. What this forum definitely ISN'T is a place to use your language skills to launch personal attacks on others. Compassion from nurse to nurse happens with one nurse showing it. Regardless of what happened in your previous job, I hope you find happiness somewhere in life.
rnsince83 said:
"
"5 times in 15 months is a lot..." You must be some kind of whoop-de-do SUPERNURSE; maybe you're blessed with a super immune system. Maybe you don't work as hard as some others; maybe you have a cushy job without much exposure to the various forms of crud the rest of us are exposed to. Maybe you never have a personal or family reason to call in -- lucky you! Maybe you're trying to be Mother Teresa. Maybe you just love your job so much you can't imagine ever calling in for any reason. Maybe you're one of the shmucks who come in with a fever and a cough, spreading the joy all around to the rest of us. Considering the crushing schedules and job stress which impair the immune system, not to mention brutalizing the spirit, 5 times in 15 months (about once every 3 months) is not that bad. [/ QUOTE ]
I challenge you and all others to pose the 5 times in 15 months question to any employer...see what they say. I merely state what I know to be true. I never claimed to be a wondernurse, nor made any attempt to discredit anyone with any statement. The poster that came to this forum making it seem that he/she is being discriminated against because of age and multiple absences ,is wanting to give only certain facts of the case, and will not go into all the rest. How on earth can any rational person decide what was right or wrong in a case such as this. Personal attacks such as the one you just launched on me are totally uncalled for. Just to enlighten you, I have not just fallen off the turnip truck, have worked in critical care for the last 11 years and am no stranger to SICK people who can't be exposed to further threats. I am all for someone calling in if truly warranted. I never said someone shouldn't call in if they are truly sick, did I? Show me where I said that. Furthermore, I never said that this person didn't truly need to be off each and every time. But the tone of the posts I see here combined with the finger-pointing when asked for more information can only make me suspicious that there is WAY more to this person's story than they are letting on and I am supposed to be instantly sympathetic to this person and not be inquisitive? This forum, last I checked, was for the asking of questions, answering of questions, tossing ideas around freely so long as they aren't personal attacks. I never made any such attack on anyone. What this forum definitely ISN'T is a place to use your language skills to launch personal attacks on others. Compassion from nurse to nurse happens with one nurse showing it. Regardless of what happened in your previous job, I hope you find happiness somewhere in life.
I am over 50 and have been a nurse since I was 20.
An "older nurse" or just "old". Semantics.
Anyway, the older I get the more respect from the younger Doctors and new RNs because I make sure that they know that I am there to help, advise and to be taken seriously.
As for being treated badly? Yes. In a few jobs I was and I ended up leaving. But, each time I learned and moved on.
It would have happened in nursing or behind a candy counter. A job is what you make of it.
An "older nurse" or just "old". Semantics.
Anyway, the older I get the more respect from the younger Doctors and new RNs because I make sure that they know that I am there to help, advise and to be taken seriously.
As for being treated badly? Yes. In a few jobs I was and I ended up leaving. But, each time I learned and moved on.
It would have happened in nursing or behind a candy counter. A job is what you make of it.
I am not sure why this has caused any one to be suspicious. I thought this was for getting information and confering with other nurses. The issue is dead in my book. I just expected some respect and not be accused of giving false information. any one that has worked long enough has run into some bad employers. That same employer may be good for some one else. Some people like that type of compulsive leadership. Personally I am an adult and do not need to be repremanded for calling in or any other type of behavior. The damage was done and I need help or direction on how to move on. And yes I have a partial disability and have had it since 1976 and have dealt with all kinds of people regarding the same. And yes there are lots of people that have not grown up and are in nursing and act just like bullies on the job. So if I can get back to my reason for starting this Is there any older nurses that can give me some direction as to how to move on and get past this. If you need more facts I can provide them but I don't feel it would help.
I am 52, a nurse for 29 years and I have had various experience in my jobs with shabby treatment. My biggest enemies were CNA's not fellow RN's. The average number of sick calls in a year is about 5 to 6, so 5 in 15 months is better than average.
I have worked hard but have tried to be a team player in all instances and it has served me well. I have had wonderful experiences in each of my jobs be they good or bad, I have learned something of value that I have been able to take away. My most treasured knowledge is how wonderful friends can be. I am very proud that I have been able to use the knowledge that I have gained over the years to help others in their struggles. Age is a gift that I would not like to return at this time.
At my hospital if you have 5 absences in 6 months it's reason to get fired. 3 days off for 1 illness is counts as 1 but then you have to not be absent for a period of time before that absence is removed from the books so if you miss the day before the oldest one should be removed you then have 2 and the date moves up. You also can't take any vacation unless you ask for it before the schedule comes out you can't ask the day before you want off. I'm not supernurse either and I don't go in sick (I will with a headache but not fever etc etc) but luckily I haven't been sick and in the past 7 years all I've been off is maternity leave and before that probably never. You asked an opinion without much information to go on then jump on someone for giving theirs
I am sorry if I offended any one I am the one that needs help not more bashing. I am emotionally drained from that last job. so please I am not a bad person, just feel like I have been noodle whipped. I was looking for help not oppinions. I know how people see things some think 5 days is excessive, they are not the ones to comment. I usually average 2 to 3 Days in a year. Please if any one has any positive suggestions on how I can get back to nursing I would appreciate it.
maybe it's time to try a totally different area. If you were in a hospital maybe LTC or home health or vice versa. If there are no other hospitals in your town and you want to stay in a hospital setting you might have to drive (I drive 30 miles one way because I like my job hope to move closer this summer) but I've done it for 13 years. Maybe travel if you can there are many options out there. Maybe more education and training to make you more marketable.
[ QUOTE ]
lam said:
I was looking for help not oppinions. I know how people see things some think 5 days is excessive, they are not the ones to comment.
[/ QUOTE ]
First of all, I never accused you of giving false information. Where did that come from? Second, how do you expect to obtain help without opinion entering the picture when you present a scenario such as the one you have. Third, you only want people who agree that calling in 5 times is just fine to comment on your situation? You aren't biased? How can you possibly solve problems in your life if you don't examine things from every angle? It is unfortunate that you feel this level of despicability for fellow nurses who don't subscribe to your every thought.
lam said:
I was looking for help not oppinions. I know how people see things some think 5 days is excessive, they are not the ones to comment.
[/ QUOTE ]
First of all, I never accused you of giving false information. Where did that come from? Second, how do you expect to obtain help without opinion entering the picture when you present a scenario such as the one you have. Third, you only want people who agree that calling in 5 times is just fine to comment on your situation? You aren't biased? How can you possibly solve problems in your life if you don't examine things from every angle? It is unfortunate that you feel this level of despicability for fellow nurses who don't subscribe to your every thought.
grapejam88
why do you keep twisting this around? who are you and why are you so nasty?
why do you keep twisting this around? who are you and why are you so nasty?
oh by the way I have spoken to other employers and not all thought 5 days was excessive
[ QUOTE ]
grapejam88 said:
What were the ages of the nurses you worked with? You referred to age as a factor for your job threat, which if unfounded is a discriminating thing to say. Yet, later in your last post, you mentioned being absent 5 times in 15 months (regardless of the flu..5 times in that time frame is a lot)and I see mention of being called in the office for "stupid stuff". Again, I will say that with bits and pieces of any story, it is hard to formulate an educated idea of what really happened. You also mentioned that you worked in an ethnically diverse population and that your employer was trying to get you to discriminate. This sounds very complicated in some regards, but very simple in others. Up front, my opinion is that somehow your employer did not regard you as dependable and for reasons I don't think we are being educated on, wanted you to leave. Without knowing everything that happened, it is not possible for a person such as myself to hazard a guess as to how you could avoid this in the future. I feel sorry that you are in such a predicament, I just don't think I can help.
[/ QUOTE ] Not all employers agree with you I have spoken with some that agree with me, so please don't mix your ideas with facts
grapejam88 said:
What were the ages of the nurses you worked with? You referred to age as a factor for your job threat, which if unfounded is a discriminating thing to say. Yet, later in your last post, you mentioned being absent 5 times in 15 months (regardless of the flu..5 times in that time frame is a lot)and I see mention of being called in the office for "stupid stuff". Again, I will say that with bits and pieces of any story, it is hard to formulate an educated idea of what really happened. You also mentioned that you worked in an ethnically diverse population and that your employer was trying to get you to discriminate. This sounds very complicated in some regards, but very simple in others. Up front, my opinion is that somehow your employer did not regard you as dependable and for reasons I don't think we are being educated on, wanted you to leave. Without knowing everything that happened, it is not possible for a person such as myself to hazard a guess as to how you could avoid this in the future. I feel sorry that you are in such a predicament, I just don't think I can help.
[/ QUOTE ] Not all employers agree with you I have spoken with some that agree with me, so please don't mix your ideas with facts
Ok, here is what I believe you came to this forum for. You did nothing wrong. Everyone else is to blame for you losing your job. The younger nurses are mean to you and I feel sorry that you got the shaft. I am 100% wrong because I know absolutely nothing. I am not a real nurse, I am a factory worker with unrealistic expectations, just as you alluded to in your post. You are on to me. I come here offering you unquestionable support, despite the fact that you are unwilling to compromise and understand that to THIS outsider (NOT ALL), your story may open some questions. I have offered no accusations, just asked questions. I accept you for the person you are despite the fact that your repeatedly trash my view on your story and defame my character. When you can reciprocate compassion to your fellow coworkers and peers, you will find overwhelming support returned to you. Beware of eliciting advice from others and then receiving it for not all the world may agree with you.
grapejam88 what the heck are you talking about? what is your point? Since we do not live in a perfect world and there are nasty vindictive people out there I fail to see where you are coming from. I have worked in a bad place period. I want to move on and since I am an older nurse it is not as easy to do that and when you put a partial disability with that it makes it even harder. I think you need to go back and read your posts I fail to see any form of support forth coming. If you are a factory worker which I have no idea and never implied such then you do not have a clue as to where I am coming from. You keep using terms like all and everyone I never stated that "all" younger nurses were like that. Boy are you on a trip.
[ QUOTE ]
Cherri448 said:
<img src="http://www.ultimatenurse.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/nurse.bmp" alt="" />
I am 52, a nurse for 29 years and I have had various experience in my jobs with shabby treatment. My biggest enemies were CNA's not fellow RN's. The average number of sick calls in a year is about 5 to 6, so 5 in 15 months is better than average.
I have worked hard but have tried to be a team player in all instances and it has served me well. I have had wonderful experiences in each of my jobs be they good or bad, I have learned something of value that I have been able to take away. My most treasured knowledge is how wonderful friends can be. I am very proud that I have been able to use the knowledge that I have gained over the years to help others in their struggles. Age is a gift that I would not like to return at this time.
[/ QUOTE ]Thank you for responding. I am in a new state and friends are limited. I agree with everything you have said. But, since I did have a bad experience how do I move on from here? Nursing is all I have done.
Cherri448 said:
<img src="http://www.ultimatenurse.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/nurse.bmp" alt="" />
I am 52, a nurse for 29 years and I have had various experience in my jobs with shabby treatment. My biggest enemies were CNA's not fellow RN's. The average number of sick calls in a year is about 5 to 6, so 5 in 15 months is better than average.
I have worked hard but have tried to be a team player in all instances and it has served me well. I have had wonderful experiences in each of my jobs be they good or bad, I have learned something of value that I have been able to take away. My most treasured knowledge is how wonderful friends can be. I am very proud that I have been able to use the knowledge that I have gained over the years to help others in their struggles. Age is a gift that I would not like to return at this time.
[/ QUOTE ]Thank you for responding. I am in a new state and friends are limited. I agree with everything you have said. But, since I did have a bad experience how do I move on from here? Nursing is all I have done.
I agree with cherri448, 5 to 6 times in 15 months is not bad at all. I think that is a average with most organizations. Some on who has a problem with that has a superiority problem.
I had a problem like that about 15 years ago. I was a new but a 42 yo nurse. The ER I worked in had a good old gal system. I was getting written up once a week by this supervisor. She would take her finger and poke it on my chest as she lectured me. Once she took her finger and put it in my pants top like a hook and pulled me in her office to council me.
Oh this was not a good thing. I was getting written up for things that others did and they did not get written up. The only good thing about the write ups was I could document every thing. After about 6 months, I went to the director and asked to go speak with the vice-president of nursing. (Had to get above the good old gal system). I documented every time she placed a finger on me. I had copies of my write ups and could prove that others were given special treatment.
I was never written up again, and that person never touched me again. I had me a sexual harassment case. If I pushed it I could have had some bucks. I just wanted the problem resolved which it was.
Good luck in your endeavors. Some times if the organization is too toxic it is best to leave. But, never burn you bridges.
I had a problem like that about 15 years ago. I was a new but a 42 yo nurse. The ER I worked in had a good old gal system. I was getting written up once a week by this supervisor. She would take her finger and poke it on my chest as she lectured me. Once she took her finger and put it in my pants top like a hook and pulled me in her office to council me.
Oh this was not a good thing. I was getting written up for things that others did and they did not get written up. The only good thing about the write ups was I could document every thing. After about 6 months, I went to the director and asked to go speak with the vice-president of nursing. (Had to get above the good old gal system). I documented every time she placed a finger on me. I had copies of my write ups and could prove that others were given special treatment.
I was never written up again, and that person never touched me again. I had me a sexual harassment case. If I pushed it I could have had some bucks. I just wanted the problem resolved which it was.
Good luck in your endeavors. Some times if the organization is too toxic it is best to leave. But, never burn you bridges.
[ QUOTE ]
1mg.epi said:
I agree with cherri448, 5 to 6 times in 15 months is not bad at all. I think that is a average with most organizations. Some on who has a problem with that has a superiority problem.
I had a problem like that about 15 years ago. I was a new but a 42 yo nurse. The ER I worked in had a good old gal system. I was getting written up once a week by this supervisor. She would take her finger and poke it on my chest as she lectured me. Once she took her finger and put it in my pants top like a hook and pulled me in her office to council me.
Oh this was not a good thing. I was getting written up for things that others did and they did not get written up. The only good thing about the write ups was I could document every thing. After about 6 months, I went to the director and asked to go speak with the vice-president of nursing. (Had to get above the good old gal system). I documented every time she placed a finger on me. I had copies of my write ups and could prove that others were given special treatment.
I was never written up again, and that person never touched me again. I had me a sexual harassment case. If I pushed it I could have had some bucks. I just wanted the problem resolved which it was.
Good luck in your endeavors. Some times if the organization is too toxic it is best to leave. But, never burn you bridges.
[/ QUOTE ] unfortunately I didn't get out and didn't get the problem resolved. Not sure how to deal with this. Do I tell new employers about this? Then I feel like I am defeating myself if I do. I just want to get back to nursing before it is too late.
1mg.epi said:
I agree with cherri448, 5 to 6 times in 15 months is not bad at all. I think that is a average with most organizations. Some on who has a problem with that has a superiority problem.
I had a problem like that about 15 years ago. I was a new but a 42 yo nurse. The ER I worked in had a good old gal system. I was getting written up once a week by this supervisor. She would take her finger and poke it on my chest as she lectured me. Once she took her finger and put it in my pants top like a hook and pulled me in her office to council me.
Oh this was not a good thing. I was getting written up for things that others did and they did not get written up. The only good thing about the write ups was I could document every thing. After about 6 months, I went to the director and asked to go speak with the vice-president of nursing. (Had to get above the good old gal system). I documented every time she placed a finger on me. I had copies of my write ups and could prove that others were given special treatment.
I was never written up again, and that person never touched me again. I had me a sexual harassment case. If I pushed it I could have had some bucks. I just wanted the problem resolved which it was.
Good luck in your endeavors. Some times if the organization is too toxic it is best to leave. But, never burn you bridges.
[/ QUOTE ] unfortunately I didn't get out and didn't get the problem resolved. Not sure how to deal with this. Do I tell new employers about this? Then I feel like I am defeating myself if I do. I just want to get back to nursing before it is too late.