Welcome to all who suffer...

[Aaron C.]

Thanks for posting Jerrie

[michellern2b]

I commend you for getting clean and being able to come back to the profession. Did co workers treat you differently when you came back, or didn't they know? I myself am in recovery and also in nursing school. I have 3 more semesters until I'm eligible to take the NCLEX-RN boards. I love nursing school and nursing. Yes it can be stressful, but I still love it and want to be a nurse more than anything, my problem is, I havn't told anyone about my past and don't think I could, for fear that my fellow nursing students and professors would look down upon me or start watching my every move like I'm still on drugs or something. I am so afraid someone will find out who I used to be, which was a very heavily addicted opiate abuser. I have been clean now for over 2 years, but some times I think about what could happen to me if I ever messed up again. I don't have any thoughts or cravings now, nor have I in the last 2 years. I just get scared that if I am constantly handling drugs, opiates in particular, will I start craving them. Am I kidding myself thinking I can be a nurse? I sometimes feel so good about my choices and how well I am doing, and then times like these when I think, what are you trying to do to yourself? Am I setting myself up for failure? Please if you have any advice, I'd love to hear it.
Thanks Michelle

[jerrie]

I am up front with my co-workers. Everyone I work with on my floor knows I diverted Demerol and was punished. I can't give narcs until Jan 2004 and the Nurses are supportive and never hesitate to give them for me. I was honest from the day I was hired. I asked to meet with the 3-11 shift and told them what I had done, where I had been and what I was trying to do today. This way they could ask me questions. If someone was going to judge me, they would judge me on the facts. Not rumors. I think if you are working an honest program and God is in the lead,it is a need to know basis. Does anyone need to know about your past right now?
Are you in a 12 step program? Sure can be a safety net. That is where I found the steps to live by and a God to lead me. I wish you well, Jerrie

[Ponce]

Don't be so hard on yourself. I am experiencing the same. Do you know of any web sites that list names of nurses in recovery so that they are not employed? Please respond

[Ponce]

Wow! Must have been hard. I go up for review in March, been clean for a year. What gets me is other nurses, so unempathetic, cold at times we be. Do you know of web sites where we are blcklisted from work, etc.?

[jerrie]

I have had some nurses treat me as if I did something to them personally. I have to understand though. It is like I crossed a moral line. They are intitled to there opinion of me. What I did was wrong and not everyone is going to be accepting of that. I have never heard of a web site with names of nurses on a black list. There is a list of names the Board publishes with nurses that have suspended, revoked or license with stipulations. Jerrie

[cherylRN]

I am an RN in California. I am a IV drug user and now have almost 30 days clean. This is not my first time getting "clean." Before this relapse, I had over 2 years. My question is there anyone out there that has been through California's diversion program. I am meeting with the BRN for a settlement hearing in Feb. and would like to know if anyone has been through the program successfully.
Thanks

[Henny]

Hello Cheryl ~ I have successfully completed the California Diversion Program, so there IS hope! You mention a settlement hearing, I am not familiar with that. Is there an action pending against your license? I self-referred to the Diversion Program and did not have to attend any "hearings". The Diversion Program has what they call Diversion Evaluation Committee (DEC) meetings that a paricipant attends to discuss their progress in recovery. If you have the opportunity to enter diversion, rather than have action taken against your license, I would do it. It is not easy, but it is better than losing your license. The one complaint that I have about the California Diversion Program is that they do not give you the freedom to choose your own recovery method/program. They mandate 12-step programs, no alternatives. Although many people have found recovery using the 12 steps, it is not for everybody. I think that more nurses would successfully complete their diversion program if they were allowed the self-determination to choose the recovery method that suits them best. Anyway, I wish you the best. Congratulations on your 30 days!
Henny

[della]

Jerrie, I am glad things are going great for you. I am thinking that I want to try and get my license back. I need to know the steps to take. Any suggestions. I can't find any info on the net. Thanks for any advice. Della

[Franny]

Hi Everyone, I am new to this forum and am delighted to see some recovering folks here. I am an LPN, currently working in Florida. My husband is an LPN also. We met in the rooms and have been married for 15 years. I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't had the support of other nurses early on, and sometimes even now. Thanks for being here. Fran