I am so sorry for what I have done to my life and career. But not any more sympathy for me. I am in the gratefull stage. I realize now I could have killed some one other than myself. I could have caused even more damage. However, I talk openly to my children and beg them never to touch alcohol my drug of choice. I began drinking at a very young age. I never stole or diverted. It took me months to stop trembling. Then I wittnessed my financial situation get worst. I reflected on my financial life and realized how careless I was with money and how many people were allowed to take advantage of me financially. I am not afraid of drugs, I am so afraid of alcohol that I do not want it any where near me.