The Least I Could Do, Gallows Jokes, Golf Humor

http://www.nursinghumor.com/gallows


Two guys are golfing on a course that is right next to a cemetery.

After they tee off, one of the golfers notices that there is a funeral procession passing by. So he takes off his hat, and places it over his heart.

When the funeral is over, the other golfer looks at the guy and asks, ''Why did you do that?''

The man replies, ''Well we were married for almost 40 years. It's the least I could do.''

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More Gallows Humor: http://www.nursinghumor.com/gallows


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Three nurses died and went to heaven, where they were met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter.

To the first, he asked, “What did you do on Earth and why should you go to heaven?” “I was a nurse in an inner city hospital,” she replied. “I worked to bring healing and peace to the poor suffering city children.” “Very noble,” said St. Peter. “You may enter.” And in through the gates she went.

To the next, he asked the same question: “So what did you do on Earth?” “I was a nurse at a missionary hospital in Africa,” she replied. “For many years, I worked with a skeleton crew of doctors and nurses who tried to reach out to as many peoples and tribes with a hand of healing and with a message of God’s love.” “How touching,” said St. Peter. “You too may enter.” And in she went.

He then came to the last nurse, to whom he asked, “So, what did you do back on Earth?” After some hesitation, she explained, “I was just a nurse at an HMO.” St. Peter pondered this for a moment, and then said, “Okay, you may enter also.”

“Whew!” said the nurse. “For a moment there, I thought you weren’t going to let me in.”

“Oh, you can come in,” said St. Peter, “but you can only stay for three days….”
—angelfire.com/wa/nursejokes

It's actually not that funny since short stays will become the norm for all patients under Obama Care.

The nurse brought a lunch tray to Norman Cousins, who was in a hospital “laughing his way to wellness.” The nurse also brought Mr. Cousins one of those glasses used for urine specimens, saying that when convenient,he should put a specimen in the glass and she’dpick it up when she came back to pick up the tray. Mr. Cousins, seeing some apple juice on the tray, put two and two together, and poured the juice in the specimen glass. The nurse came back and picked up the specimen, held it up to the light and said, “Mr. Cousins, this looks a little off. The color doesn’t seem quite right. Are you feeling okay?” Mr. Cousins reached out his hand for the glass and said, “Here, let me look.”

After looking at it, he said, “Okay, I’ll run it through again,” then drank it. The nurse fainted.
—Casey Cook