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Thread: Questions

  1. #1
    Junior Member
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    Feb 2012
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    Questions

    I work in a nursing home and an assisted living facility and being a male cna I understand a female not wanting a male caregiver. In the nursing home that is no issue there are plenty of female caregivers. In the assisted living facility where I work there is 1 cna/aide per shift and residents are mainly female. My question is this: I assist with showering 2 females which was uneasy for them at first but when they seen I respected them and did everything I could to not embarass them they do fine with me. I have 1 that has dementia and the first time I had to assist her really bothered her and I dont take offence to that I understand it I try to make it as easy as possible for her but she never forgot that. I have always kept in mind that "people will forget what you say but they will never forget how you made them feel" and I feel terrible that it bothered her that bad. She usually showers on the shift where the females are but when she gets confused she'll say she never had her shower, which I try to get her to wait till there is a female available. I had a female co worker say that if she wanted it I needed to assist and that leads me to wonder even though she has dementia and not comfortable with a male caregiver wouldnt it be a form of abuse to make a male give a female a shower knowing that in her right state of mind she doesnt want a male helper ? I do not ever want to make a person feel like she did the first time I felt bad about that and appologized.

  2. #2
    Moderator
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonny123 View Post
    I work in a nursing home and an assisted living facility and being a male cna I understand a female not wanting a male caregiver. In the nursing home that is no issue there are plenty of female caregivers. In the assisted living facility where I work there is 1 cna/aide per shift and residents are mainly female. My question is this: I assist with showering 2 females which was uneasy for them at first but when they seen I respected them and did everything I could to not embarass them they do fine with me. I have 1 that has dementia and the first time I had to assist her really bothered her and I dont take offence to that I understand it I try to make it as easy as possible for her but she never forgot that. I have always kept in mind that "people will forget what you say but they will never forget how you made them feel" and I feel terrible that it bothered her that bad. She usually showers on the shift where the females are but when she gets confused she'll say she never had her shower, which I try to get her to wait till there is a female available. I had a female co worker say that if she wanted it I needed to assist and that leads me to wonder even though she has dementia and not comfortable with a male caregiver wouldnt it be a form of abuse to make a male give a female a shower knowing that in her right state of mind she doesnt want a male helper ? I do not ever want to make a person feel like she did the first time I felt bad about that and appologized.
    Sonny,

    You describe a tough situation. Reasonably speaking, it is expected the best possible accommodations are made to meet individual needs however, it can't always happen. By striving to preserve your female residents' dignity when bathing and toileting, you accommodate and most of the time, there isn't a problem and everyone survives. If you have an individual that objects strongly and resists your offers for routine care AND you force her to comply, you are guilty of abuse. Let her be bathed by females at other times- make an effort and then be done with it. If she's soiled and a reasonable effort is made to find a female coworker to at least assist you, she still objects strongly and you don't clean her, you are guilty of neglect. Always be soft spoken, consistently firm but gentle in your approach, leave the door open but the curtain pulled and do the job that is needed.

    Good luck,

    R
    Last edited by Ricu; 02-06-2012 at 05:09 PM.

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