http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...m.thoughts.htm

1) If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will always be yours. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with. But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff, eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't appear to realize that you had set it free....... You either married it or gave birth to it.

2) Reason to smile: Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.

3) My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.

4) The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.

5) The nice part about living in a small town: When you don't know what you're doing, someone else always does.

6) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

7) Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.

8) Amazing! You hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes!

9) They keep telling us to get in touch with our bodies. Mine isn't all that communicative but I heard from it the other day after I said, "Body, how'd you like to go to the six o'clock class in vigorous toning?" Clear as a bell my body said, "Listen fatty .... do it and die."

10) I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day.

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See also:

Why Cats Are Better Than Men, Battles of The Sexes Jokes, Cat-Pet Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-battle...-than-men.html
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25 Year Old Breasts, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Marriage Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-battle...d-breasts.html
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Top Ten Reasons Why God Created Eve, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Top Ten Humor:
http://www.4nursing.com/humor-battle...eated-eve.html
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17 Ways To Be A WOMAN.... From A Somewhat Bitter Man, Battle of The Sexes:
http://www.nursinghumor.com/
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The Perfect Man, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Relationship Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...erfect.man.htm
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Name Calling, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Relationship Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...me.calling.htm
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A Real Lady, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Infidelity Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing....real.lady.htm
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A Woman Thirty Years Younger, Marriage Jokes, Battle of the Sexes Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...rs.younger.htm
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Mating Bulls, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Marriage Humor
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...ting.bulls.htm
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Five Kinds of Sex, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Marriage Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...nds.of.sex.htm
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Men Are Like . . ., Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Relationship Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...n.are.like.htm
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Following Orders, Battle of the Sexes Jokes, Gallows Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...ing.orders.htm
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Top Fourteen Things PMS Stands For, Top Ten Jokes, Battle of The Sexes Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...stands.for.htm
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The Escapee, Battle of The Sexes Jokes, Relationship Humor:
http://www.nursefriendly.com/nursing...he.escapee.htm
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Sincerely,

Andrew Lopez, BS RN
Nursefriendly, Inc. A New Jersey Corporation.
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